Chapter Four

It was now Sunday morning, and both Abbey and her dad were awake. She stopped sobbing sometime early that morning, having fallen into a deep welcoming sleep which had also allowed him some shut-eye. Abbey appeared to be in a better mood and asked her dad several questions, which he could not answer satisfactorily. “Where is mummy, why did she leave, doesn’t she love me, what did I do to make her leave?”

He realized Abbey perceived that she was responsible for her mom leaving. He tried to dispel the belief that she was the cause of their current predicament, by explaining as best as he could that the underlying factor was the breakdown of the relationship between him and her mother. Holding back tears he explained, “Abbey, my dear daughter, it’s no fault of yours. Mom leaving has nothing to do with you.” She stared at him attentively with her sad green eyes open wide, he continued, “Mommy and I have been having some problems. We’ve been having lots of disagreements. Do you know what that means?” Abbey frowned, as she nodded her head from side to side, implying she didn’t understand what he meant. He continued, “Sometimes, Mommy wants to read a book in the room, but Daddy wants to turn on the TV. That’s a tiny disagreement – when we both want to do different things and not the same thing, like when I want burgers for dinner and you want ice cream for breakfast lunch and dinner!” This made Abbey smile for a split second. He was glad he got a semi-smile out of her then continued, “And our disagreements have made us very unhappy. My darling Abbey, I promise, I will do all I can to bring Mommy back to us.” Telling from her facial expression he realized she still didn’t understand everything he just explained and she didn’t seem convinced that he could bring her mom back.

It was time for their Sunday breakfast which happened to be pre-cooked meals warmed in the microwave. No fuss was made and the prepackaged meals were eaten due to hunger, no savouring experience which would have been a more common response. The meal was interspersed with a few words from both of them. This was a new experience for them both as Abbey, usually bubbly and talkative, was now subdued and more monosyllabic in her speech.

Like so many things in life, nothing ever happens in isolation. Invariably there will always be some form of knock-on effect or effects. One such effect was now beginning to loom “loudly” into view. He realized he needed to make arrangements with one of his workmates who lived close by for work the next day. He would pick him up at around six thirty and bring him back home if they did not pass a bar in the afternoon at around five. Quinn was the one who waited for the nanny Jean as she was only expected at her place of work at eight o’clock. He needed to make new arrangements, hopefully only temporary, to suit their current situation.

Looking across the table, he felt he had to talk to Abbey about making new arrangements for her weekday routine. He told her that he would tell his workmate, Fred, to go to work without him and that he’d come to work later, using his own car. He also mentioned that he was going to wait for Jean to explain their circumstance, and to ask her to come in earlier and leave a little later to wait till he returned from work. She nodded her head in a positive motion. Next, she got off her chair and came over, to stand beside him. Throwing his arm around her little shoulders, he drew her closer and rested her head against him. He was barely able to get his words out, in a soft and stammering voice, he expressed his thoughts to her, “Abbey, dear innocent Abbey. What have I done to you, my child?” As if in answer to this question, she burrowed her head deeper into his side. For the moment they each found a bit of comfort in one another. To reassure her, he put his hand gently onto her tussled hair. They stayed like that as neither wanted to break that moment. It felt like a small psychological respite, a bit of emotional shelter in the storm they were experiencing. This magical moment did not last long.

He needed to make two phone calls for the next day’s arrangement. Before making those calls, he decided to try and reach Quinn one more time. As he pressed the sequence of numbers on his cell phone, he looked down at Abbey, her pretty face with light green eyes, deep red coloured hair and a sprinkling of freckles on both her cheeks all part of her Irish heritage from Quinn’s side of the family. The phone rang and as expected, she must have seen his number come up on her phone and ended up cutting the call. A little frustrated he made the calls necessary, one to Jean, the nanny and one to Fred, his workmate explaining their circumstance and the altered arrangement for the next day.  

With his limited culinary skills, he managed to put together a lunchtime meal for the two, consisting of rice, boiled vegetables, and fried some steaks he had found in the deep freezer. They sat down to their meal, eating in a kind of semi-silence, neither knowing what to say. The afternoon seemed to stretch on and the day began to draw to a close, yet no closure on the dilemma facing them. 

That night, neither felt like eating as hunger pangs were replaced by heart-felt loss, so both retired to bed, him after drinking a cup of black coffee and her a cup of warm chocolate. Just like the previous night, they opted to share the main bedroom. That night Abbey slept restlessly, tossing and turning with a choking cry escaping from her ever so often. It turned out to be a long night for sleep eluded him plus Abbey’s restlessness just heightened the tension that gripped him, body, heart and soul. Eventually, she did drift into a deep sleep that cushioned her from her restlessness.

For him, morning could not come soon enough. For Abbey, morning came too soon. If it were possible for the night to extend endlessly and for her to be caught up in an endless sleep, it would be counted as a blessing. But, blessing it was not to be. With the first light of dawn, they were both up, she rubbing the sleep out of her eyes and him a taught facial expression, not quite ready to face the day. No good avoiding the inevitable. He got out of bed and in a set order, had his bath and dressed, bathed Abbey and dressed her and they both sat down to a breakfast of cereals. He had made himself a mug of coffee and for her, warm milk with a little sugar. 

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